Nightmare at RVEEH

That horrible, tingly feeling
That jumpy tic you developed
The quickened heartbeat, the adrenaline rush
The rushing about with a pounding heart
The timid tones, the measured speech
The puppy-dog eagerness to please
The fake smiles, the groveling
The accepting of unjust blame
The profuse apologies and thanks
The doormat-like existence
Walking on tip-toes, too fearful to tread

Those sound like diligent 'boot-polishing'

On the contrary
Those are survival skills
Intended for the continued existence of a certain me
not fool-proof, oh no
They fail you when you least expect it
And so the waves come crashing down

That horror that lurks
Never goes away, patiently waiting
And when it gains the upper hand
It gobbles you up, chews
And spits your remains out
For all the world to see
To laugh at, to pity
Your miserable life and reputation in shreds
While its own remains intact
It ambles away, care-free and whistling
Full from the meal it made of you